A tease.

so life is very different when you don't constantly have internet access. This is the first time that I've been down to the hotel in over a week.
I have been writing some stuff that I'll get up here eventually, but I'm leaving tomorrow at 7 for a few nights in the Tetons.
There are bugs all over my computer screen and the fireworks have already started in Gardiner, MT. One of these nights, I may have to set off the pre-1976 black cat (louder, bigger, badder, and much better at blowing off digits) that I acquired in Des Moines, Iowa on the way out here.
More soon...

Skies and guns

I came across this ad in the Gardiner Community Newsletter:

2-Family Yard Sale! Friday, 1:00 pm - 7:00 pm and Saturday 9:00 am - 5:00 pm at 3 Hesperus Lane. Take Dry Creek Road, then Arcturus to the Welcome Sign. TV's, VCR's, B&W Darkroom w/Omega enlarger, Oak & Maple Headboards, Glass-insert Table, Oak Cradle, Air Conditioner, Weight Bench, Skies, Guns, Clothing, Toys, Candles, Household Items, Much MORE!

Cheap guns available with no background check? I’m there.

Fairy Falls

I went on a hike to the 197' fairy falls the other day. Got a great view of Grand Prismatic Spring, the largest and arguably the most beautiful hot spring in the park.

Toasty Pie-maker

So I found this thing in one of my cabinets the other night. Caitlin tells me that the Kiwis call them "Toasty Pie-makers". It is an electric skillet that must be from the 1970's. There's no way that GE could put one of these on the market today. What I'm holding in my hand is a plug that connects a regular AC 115 Volt outlet to the element beneath the skillet. On one side is a dial that goes from 0 to 450° and on the other, is a warning pressed into the plastic that reads "1200 Watts...DO NOT IMMERSE IN WATER". I have a hunch that this is not a "standard issue" appliance in government housing units. But it's great for making pancakes.

On a side note, law enforcement park rangers carry tazers here. They actually used them the other night to capture some fugitives hiding out in the park.

I had a really cool interaction with horses the other day. On the drive from Mammoth to Livingston, there was a pack of horses. As I drove by, there were two yearlings, noticeably lying motionless on their sides, with two adult horses standing over them kind of crossing their heads. It was a very powerful image.
I stopped to use the bathroom less than half a mile down the road and decided I would go back to confirm what I saw. I pulled into the little driveway of the fenced grazing area, and saw a pack of around 10 healthy horses – all looking at me. I was immediately relieved.
I stood there for a few minutes, watching them. Some of the horses cautiously approached, while others stood there looking at me. There were three young horses, obviously with their mothers – at least two easily recognizable mother-yearling pairs. They were all just standing there, checking me out. Horses always seem to have an aura around them. Greyhounds are the same way - they don’t seem to be of this Earth. Just such beautiful, calm creatures.

Some thoughts about this place...

Yellowstone really is a (fairly large) hunk of land that “preserves” what North America was like 600 years ago. I use quotes because it is impossible to actually do that. But it’s the best that we’ve got. And it’s different enough from anywhere else that I’ve ever been.

I should also mention that Yellowstone is the size of Rhode Island and Delaware combined. Look at a map - to anyone who lives in the northeast, it's huge.

During my seasonal training, a veteran ranger was asking us to try to take our interactions with visitors beyond dry facts and to start thinking about what Yellowstone means from a historical, cultural, natural, etc. standpoint.
"You can describe a bison as a 2000 pound mammal with horns that can run 35 mph, or you can talk about what the bison means - talk about the fact that there were several million of these creatures that roamed North America before settlers moved west. Herds so large that it would take more than 24 hours for all of them to walk by. But through hunting (mostly for sport - passengers on the early railroads would just lean out the window and shoot bison to pass the time), the population was cut to only 24. Yes 24. And where do you think those 24 lived? Since that time, the population has rebounded and there are now more than 4,000 bison in the Greater Yellowstone Ecosystem."
She then told a story of the first rangers who captured an infamous poacher shooting bison in the park, crediting them with saving the bison from extinction.
All in all a really enthralling talk amidst powerpoint presentations with exciting topics such as radio protocol or "how to fill out your direct deposit forms!".

Why they make us wear gaitors...

The photos can't capture the noise. Imagine yourself standing in an open basin, maybe a few acres in size, surrounded by pine trees. All around you, hundreds of hydrothermal features, ranging in size from hundreds of feet in diamater to tiny holes in the ground, are gurgling, hissing, bubbling, burping and growling. As you move around, the cacauphony evolves (I'm going to try to buy a recorder so I can share it with you). Steam billows over the larger pools and blows in your face when the wind changes direction, the heat and odor forcing you to turn. It's like standing on a doily over a pot of boiling water.

Quality control

I am slightly worried that I might say some things on here that I’m not supposed to, about the way things work inside the group, what is wrong with the system, science topics that I thought were public, etc. that might get people here in some sort of trouble. I am working for the government now. And the government taps phones. Who knows how many people (or powerful computers) they have crammed into a dimly-lit room in the basement of the pentagon just scouring blog after blog looking for terror plots.

I was actually reading a memo on the bulletin board in our office about handling the press. Apparently, when doing an interview or discussing your work/the park, you must state that your opinions in no way represent the official views of Yellowstone National Park or the National Park Service. If anybody wants the official word of the park, the branch of something, something are more than happy to speak to them. I am pretty sure that memo went out after the whole Jim Hanson NASA debacle.

So I’m going to accept the above paragraph as my disclaimer. All of this is my own opinion and I’m legally free to say whatever I like. Thanks America.

Also, I was thinking the other day that the beauty of a personal blog is that, in addition to sharing photos and stories about your life, it allows you to share a tiny glimpse of your internal dialog with others. I hope you enjoy mine.

The sea cow belongs to which taxonomic order?

http://www.ultimateungulate.com

un·gu·late (un'gyoo-lit) [L., unguis, a hoof; -atus suffix meaning provided with] n. a mammal having hoofs

Bison

Can I just say how much I love these animals...

Counter Assault

Bear spray is an interesting product. It is a small fire extinguisher filled with highly pressurized liquid. The bear spray that I now possess is called “Counter Assault Bear Deterrent”. It is basically 2.0% capcaicin and related capsaicinoids* and 98.0% other ingredients. The * states that these related capsaicinoids were derived from Oleoresin of Capsicum. What? That’s bullshit. My tax dollars are going to second-rate capsaicinoids.

I am going to bear safety training on Tuesday where I will be taught how to properly use similar canisters that are filled with pressurized water. Cheryl insisted that I get some real practice in with an “expired” canister. Apparently all park employees are required to get a new one each year, despite the fact that these things probably have a lifetime of at least 5-10 years. Interestingly enough, last year's Counter Assault only has 1.73% capcaicin and related capsaicinoids. Apparently the “maximum strength” version that I ended up with can deter bigger, meaner bears. I feel so much safer already.

So the stuff is basically disgustingly-powerful pepper spray. If it can take down a charging, 1 ton grizzly, then this shit would destroy a mugger. Or any other human being for that matter.

I tested the “expired” canister while hiking on Specimen Ridge with Dawn and Dan. We acted everything out. Dan turned and yelled, “Dave, there’s a bear charging!” I screamed, "holy crap!" and clumsily struggled to remove the veclro safety strap that was holding the Counter Assault to my belt. I got it out, fumbled with the little plastic safety cap over the trigger and depressed the lever. A powerful cloud of orange droplets shot out nearly 10-15 feet in front of me, expanding as it did. The kickback was really surprising. But I failed my first test. Definitely would have been eaten, probably before getting the thing out of the holdster.

I just looked at their website and this is on the homepage:

"No, humans"

As we were walking along in the Norris backbasin (where I was working Thursday), we approached an area with small lodgepole pine trees and a thin soil layer just beyond the thermal features. Cheryl (park geologist, my supervisor) reached down and picked something up.
“Ahh, an obsidian flake”
She was holding a piece of obsidian about the size of a pad of butter. She handed it to me. I haven’t yet visited the obsidian cliffs, so it was the first time I had seen naturally occurring obsidian (outside of a classroom).
“Oh cool,” I said, thinking to myself that it was pretty sharp. Hank (park geologist, Cheryl's husband) had told me earlier in the day that some surgeons actually prefer to use obsidian instead of steel for their scalpels and told a story of slicing his thumb on a piece of obsidian.
“I was just wrenching on the thing, trying to get it out of the ground...then one of the others in the group pointed out that I had blood all over my hand. I had a 1” deep gash cutting right down the center of my thumb. It was the only time I’ve ever had to elevate something. But the doctor told me to keep pressure on it and it would be fine the next day. And damned if the next day that cut hadn’t healed completely.”
I turned to Cheryl and asked, “Was this carried here by water?” We were at least 8 miles from Obsidian Cliff.
“No, humans. I said obsidian flake for a reason”
That blows my mind. And it makes me feel a little giddy inside.

Okay...

Thanks to the wireless internet available from the parking lot at the Yellowstone Inn in Gardiner, MT, I successfully started this little blog.

I have a lot to write about, as this past week has been full of new and exciting experiences. For example, on Tuesday I stood beneath the roots of a 6-foot-wide petrified redwood stump exposed on the side of a mountain, and on Wednesday I was forced to outrun three irritated male bison while setting up a gas monitoring station near a group of hydrogen sulfide gas vents that coincedentally heat their bathroom floor in the winter (resulting in the unofficial name of "Bison Poop Flats"). Stories will come soon. Right now, it is more important for me to drive over 80 miles so that I can buy things like toilet paper and beef jerky at a reasonable price.

For now, read about the park: Official Yellowstone NP Page .

And take a look at my new office:


Much more soon...